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THE GREAT CHEESE RIOT

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Boston had its Tea Party. What of the Great Cheese Riot?

Was it something to keep quiet about, happening as it did

In 1766 at Nottingham’s annual Goose Fair

Where you were free to goose whichever fair

You fancied or were near enough to, coming at a time though

Of shortages and rising prices. Violence broke out

When residents attempted to prevent rapacious

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Lincolnshire traders getting away with Nottingham

Cheeses bought fair and square at the fair,

If at inflated prices; prices twice as high as those sold in Coventry

The week before, but still, from the local point of view,

There weren’t enough cheeses to go round,

Although the cheeses were, each one round as a drum,

And similar to Red Leicester. This bruited a mighty to-do.

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A warehouse and a cargo boat were overcome

And hundreds of these looted wheels were sent rolling

Through the streets, confiscated from that gang from Lincs

By angry, empty-bellied rioters. Government dragoons

Were called in, geese went squawking everywhere.

And when the mayor of Nottingham tried to quell

The turmoil he was knocked over by a rolling cheese wheel.

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After that the military opened fire. A man who was guarding

His cheese was taken for a rioter instead and shot dead.

Then a mounted posse was sent to track down the seized

Cheese which had quit the town and ended up

In Castle Donnington. There, the magistrate refused

To sign warrants for the searches that were proposed.

In response, the posse detained several villagers

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And beat them senseless before the gates of the magistrate’s

Residence. The posse was then set upon by a mob

Of women lobbing stones and withdrew, empty-handed.

Cheese-wagons had to be formed into convoys,

An armed escort provided. Only then did the unrest

Come to a stop. The 250th anniversary of this riot

Was marked in 2016 by a more recent mayor

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Of Nottingham in conjunction with a local cheese shop.